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Fathers: Does this come close to how you feel about your daughter getting married?

I have only one daughter.  Her name is Krista and she's a full-fledged adult.

I was there when she was born and I even saw her before my wife did.  I fell in love with her and with being a dad right away.  I loved and still love every minute of being her father.  I could show you my favorite thousand pictures of her taken from her first day to the present time and I'd smile the whole time.

The memories involving her are voluminous and all positive including the times she and I locked horns over some issue.  I was there from her first day and even there when she put in a bid on her first house.  She's a real sweetheart.

Then Adam enters her life.  When I first met him I could see there was a certain "snap, crackle and pop" between them that indicated that he could be the one.  A few months down the line, he called me and said "I'm going to ask your daughter to marry me."  With enthusiasm and sincerity, I said, "Welcome to the family." 

Super-wife/mom and I got a bottle of Great Lakes Red out of the fridge and sang "The Hallelujah Chorus" a couple of times.  Then super-daughter called the next day filled with joy and anticipation. 

Let it be noted that I really like Adam.  Neat guy and he seems to really love my daughter.  He's bright, ambitious and he has the right values.  Amen, right?

As Gladys and I were talking about dancing the polka at their wedding, something in my "dad DNA" got twisted.  Of course, I don't know this guy as well as my daughter.  He jumps into the arena where I've spent most of my life, that being politics.  Usually, I'm a pretty tolerant guy and I usually try to listen pretty carefully before I say anything too dumb.

I violated that practice with Adam as I tried to kick his tires a couple of times with a little gusto.  Each time there was a demon inside of me that said this guy is going to marry my daughter.

My wife tried to provide perspective, as my daughter did through her tears.  I apologized around the table to everybody including Adam.  And I meant it.   This brings me to this book which brought my wife to the point of tears as she came into my home office sobbing in laughter.

It's titled: 8 Simple Rules for Marrying My Daughter: And Other Reasonable Advice from the Father of the Bride (Not that Anyone is Paying Attention)

That's it.  This guy hits the nail on the head.  He's been there.  From the book:

"Groom" as a noun means "man who will marry my daughter." "Groom" as a verb means "monkeys eating lice off each other." The challenge for a father is to accept the reality of the former without fixating on a mental image of the latter.

I accept and embrace the first definition.  Krista and Adam, I celebrate your relationship and your upcoming wedding. 

The best part of my life has been marrying mom and starting our own family.  The best stuff of life for me has been being part of that and playing a role in the growth of you and your brother, Justin.

I hope and pray for nothing less for you AND Adam. 

I really look forward to getting to know him better as an individual separate from you.

For Adam, if you guys have a daughter and when she finds the right guy, I invite you to think back.  Keep good notes and maybe even blog about it.  Your daughter . . . wow . . . that would make me a grandfather. 

I love you both.  I'm looking forward to taking "my super-pumpkin" for that walk down the aisle and to your hand that will take hers.



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